I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
