Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Randomize
