there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
