Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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