all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
Randomize
