we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Randomize
