OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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