I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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