If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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