We're facebook friends in real life
You just made me feel so damn special
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Randomize
