i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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