I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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