It's Friday. Sex?
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
