Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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