Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Randomize
