I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Randomize
