To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
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