btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
