I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
