the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Please, let me fuck your mom
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
COCAINE IS GR8
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
