the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
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