btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Randomize
