Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
