when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Randomize
