yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
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