after a month anything with tits is on the radar
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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