is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
