Umm I'm too high to move.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize
