we made out on top of his cat.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
