It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
I smell like Dick and happiness
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
