put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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