3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
