i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
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