Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
