She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Randomize
