Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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