Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize
