So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
