Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
