i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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