I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
The beer is more important than you right now.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Randomize
