I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
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