Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Randomize
