the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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