Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Randomize
