I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
