u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
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