So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
y did u give ur computer a hand job?
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
True or false: I did not bring home a 28 year old last night.
True? Did she teach you things?
She taught me the meaning of awkward goodbyes at 530 am.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
