a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Randomize