Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
